KNEEL BEFORE HIM - A LOOK AT LORD LUCIUS KAINE

Good day, to the wealthy and commoners. This week, I thought it would be best if we take a look at one of the finest gentleman in the world. He is the leader of the Commonwealth. Here is, narrating his monologue and presenting himself before an American audience for the first time: Lord Lucius Kaine. If you could get out of your seats in front of your bloody computers and applaud, welcome the Lord of the Commonwealth.

-- My name is Lord Lucius Kaine of the House of Kaine. I originate from Birmingham, the second city of the United Kingdom after London. My room is located in the East Wing of the Kaine mansion. I own dozens pieces of arts that collectively worth more than most of your salaries.
--I believe in taking care of myself, with a balanced diet and a rigorous training routine to keep my Adonis physique at the peak of perfection. Upon waking up in the morning, I have my servant Weasley prepare my usual morning breakfast while I do a set of morning crunches. I can do a thousand now. After this, I convene in the dining room with Lady Allison for our breakfast, which consists of eggs over easy, along with delicious strips of bacon from the healthiest pig in the herds of the land.

- After this, I enter the training room in the west wing to begin my training regiment with my very well paid trainers for two hours.

- Later on that evening, after High Tea...I'm sorry, I forgot I'm talking to Americans. At High Tea time, I enjoy a delicious Steak and Kidney Pie by Weasley, while Lady Allison dines on Shepherd's Pie.

- From there, we depart our home in our horse carriage to the nearest wrestling event. If not that, we'll take the train or airplane to the designated city, where a horse carriage will be waiting to carry us to the event.

Now you ask yourself--why is the Lord of the Commonwealth explaining his daily life? The answer is very simple: because I want you to know. They say that the wealthy only look after the wealthy. That is not true, for Lord Lucius Kaine will fight for the commoners. True, I wouldn't want to touch you, but that doesn't mean I don't care for you. I want you to be represented by the absolute best that the world has created. That the XWW, specifically the XIP brand has to offer. A life of privilege and class like mine can only bring importance to yours. Your stock would instantly rise by being in my presence. What more could a commoner ask for?

--So when you think of your heroes, don't think about the one-eyed psychopathic pirate. Don't think about the man in paint. Think of me. Believe in me: Lord Lucius Kaine. A man that, although doesn't live among the people, is for the people.

- Lord Lucius Kaine